SIOUX CITY, IOWA - Local curmudgeon Barry Winters said that he's looking forward to presidential candidate Barack Obama's health care plan. "He's got my vote," Winters, 43, said on Friday. "His health care plan will definitely help Americans without health insurance like myself."
The health care plan will be especially helpful for Winters. "Earlier this year, I was laid off from the steel mill and sold one of my kidneys to pay my mortgage. I still have my house--knock on wood--but I severely underestimated the convenience of having all of my internal organs."
"The pain is constant," he continued. "Because I'm diabetic, my remaining kidney just isn't up to the task. I'm pretty sure that the dull ache in my back is the beginning stage of acute renal failure. I guess I won't know until I can get me some of that free national health care that Obama's been talkin' about on the T.V."
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